Feeling The Weight Of Our Times

I’m running on fumes. When quarantine began 8 weeks ago, I leaned into it with a positive mindset, viewing the time off the ice as an opportunity to train in new ways that will allow me to come back stronger and refreshed mentally and physically. But training in isolation has gotten to me and lately, showing up has become a real chore.

I’ve worked from home for 29 years and heading to the rink and gym daily is usually the social highlight of my days. Although you don’t often see me smiling in my workout/training photos and videos, I smile most of the time and at everyone I see. I’m a highly social being and hiding my smile behind a mask during my weekly grocery runs is so unsatisfying. There’s just no way to connect with another person in public with half your face covered and while maintaining social distance.

I’m human and like most of us during these uncertain days, I have grave concerns about our health and financial future thus it sometimes feels rather pointless to practice stick handling in an empty garage. In “normal” days, my energy and enthusiasm are what lead and power our Monday on-ice group training sessions, but today I feel nearly empty.

I know that I will regain my motivation, but it’s important that my posts be authentic thus I want you to know where I’ve been at over the last week or so. I’m not an endless fount of inspiration. No one is. I struggle through peaks and valleys just like you.

I will work my way out of this. In fact, writing this post has helped me take the first step back up. And it looks like we might be cleared to skate at the end of this week. That will boost the intensity in my workouts immediately.

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